RECIPE: Shelley's Cranberry Relish and Katie's Cranberry-Orange Sauce

First of all, let me just say that if I ever attempted to make my family even taste either of these recipes, they would fall to the ground clutching their throats and writhing around, wailing that I was trying to maliciously POISON THEM: death by cranberry.

Second of all, let me tell you that some people -- people with educated palates and discerning taste -- really love cranberries in many forms, including juice from Ocean Spray and that layered cranberry-lime Christmas Jell-O concoction (the one with the pineapple in the lime layer and the some-other-fruit-I-can't-remember in the cranberry layer, divided by a cream cheese layer which is just so colorful and festive) your elderly aunt makes and craisins on our chef salads. We also love cranberry sauce and cranberry relish and we're glad, you hear? GLAD that you don't like cranberry relish or cranberry sauce because that way THERE'S MORE FOR US SO HA HA HAHAHA!!!

*ahem*

Anyway, both of these recipes are easy and delicious, one from me and one from my friend Katie W., who is half of my Ka(yte)ie pair of chums. I'm serving cranberries in some form or other for today's Sunday dinner, the last spread of the holiday season.

Shelley's Cranberry Relish (pictured above)

Ingredients
2 cans whole berry cranberry sauce
1/2 cup boiling water
1 large navel orange*
1 large apple (I like sweet apples for this recipe, such as Honeycrisp)*
1 teaspoon grated orange zest
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg

Directions
Empty the two cans of cranberry sauce into a large mixing bowl. Add the half-cup of boiling water and stir to allow the cranberry sauce to dissolve, using a spoon to chop up the larger bits.

While the cranberry sauce is dissolving, peel and chop the navel orange, grating one teaspoon of the zest into the cranberry sauce. Finely chop the orange and add it to the cranberry sauce. Wash the apple and dice; add to the cranberry-orange mixture. Add spices and stir thoroughly.
Cover with plastic wrap and chill for at least two hours to allow flavors to blend.

Serve in a pretty dish and place on your beautifully set holiday table where it will look lovely throughout the meal because no one in your family will touch it except for you. Sulkily remove from table at the end of the meal and return to fridge; eat in your own over the next few days, congratulating yourself on the delicious and nutritious value of all the fruity goodness.

*Substitute two smaller fruits for one large

Katie's Cranberry-Orange Sauce

Ingredients
1/2 cup of water

1 1/2 cups of sugar

4 cups cranberries

1 orange, peeled, seeded, chopped

2 tablespoons freshly grated orange peel

Directions

Place water and sugar in a saucepan. Stir until the sugar is dissolved. Bring to a boil, and add the cranberries. Boil, stirring, just long enough for the berries to pop, but not to cook them very much. Cool. Add chopped oranges and grated rind. Taste for sweetness; add more sugar if desired. Chill thoroughly. Yield: about 5 cups